Friday 19 October 2012

Don't Panic!



Panic or should I say Panic attacks. If you have never had one you are very lucky. If you have then you will understand.

I guess mine started when I was young.I am not blaming my mum buts I don't think it helped. She had a very bad experience being trapped in an elevator with a person who was ill. It left her with a real fear and I wonder if some of that rubbed off onto me.

My earliest memory was going on the London underground. I hated it all the crowds and rush it was my personal nightmare. I always remember being offered a seat as I looked like I was pass out on the spot.
As I got older it did not get better. Then to make matters worse I fainted on the underground train, which only made my fears worse. Later I married and my husband often lost patience with  me when I needed to rush out of places when I could not cope.

What I have to say is "You can't help it!" Your body tells you that you are in danger. For me I feel faint and short of breath and dizzy. My heart races and I need to sit down or get out of the place I am in. I fight the panic often even on basic shopping trips which should be fun. I avoid concerts and places were lots of people will be, or worse I can't sit at the end of a row. The last time I saw a show we arrived and our seats were right in the centre. and I spend the whole first half calming myself down.

The older I get the more things bother me. I hate small spaces, concerts, movies or shows all make me break out in a sweat. The over riding fear of being trapped is really unpleasant and sad. I have some control but its not something you can just wish away, or get over,
These days I don't get out much and I live in the countryside both has added to the problem in a way as I don't see any volume of people.

I do not think family and friends know what a huge problem this is for me, as I cover it well. I am a happy person so I can cover it up, but maybe that works against me at times.
So if you suffer or knows someone who does, be kind to yourself or them. We need understanding and support.
Please, please, please never say "Pull yourself together" this really does not help and its not as simple as that.
I stress again be kind, and supportive and have patience. Please


2 comments :

  1. I've had these for 23 years and hate them. They're few and far between now thankfully but I used to really struggle with them. much sympathy. Brilliant post - I wish more people understood. x

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    Replies
    1. Hi Lisa sorry you have suffered as well. It does so effect your life but it must not stop us being us lol

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