As a child I was very tiny which was a constant worry to my parents. Then when I turned five it totally went the other way and I put on weight. No one could find the answer as it was not from eating too much . At this time I started school and at first it was fine, but the older I got the worse the bullying got. The kids would pick on my because I was chubby and not very outgoing.
The older I got the worse it became and never under estimate how bad children can be.
When I went to the senior school at 11 it was a nightmare at times. The first year was great as I had been put in a lower class. As I was bright I was in demand and everyone wanted to be my friend. Them after a year they moved me into a new class and all those friends had gone. My friends from the lower class didn't want me as I was a snob and my new class mates didn't want me either.
I still remember what it was like to stand in the playground on my own , pretending to read like I wasn't bothered about being alone. I was very lonely in those years and hated going to school, most days I would have done anything to get out of going. As a result those early days of my being bright disappeared as I let my school work slip.
I never really got over those early days of being bullied and even though I am an adult I still carry the scars from those days.
Thankfully these days I am married and happy but I wish I could go back in time and tell my 12 year old self its going to be ok.
I was neither popular nor hated at school but in secondary school there were a couple of boys that made my school life a misery. I hated going in every day and felt sick every time I spotted the 2 boys coming toward me calling me names, taking the mick and making me look a right plank in front of everyone.
ReplyDelete20 odd years later and I spoke to one of the boys on fb and explained just how his bullying affected me. This guy could not have been more sorry and apologetic if he had tried and he was sincere in his apologies too. It seemed he had a crappy homelife (which turned out to be evry similar to mine) and it's the only excuse he had. Who would have thought that we could have been going through the same crap at the same time. The guy seems like a nice person now that doesn't bully or tolerate bullying but I feel so much better having told him what he did.
Thank you for sharing your story too, bullying is an emotive subject.
I'm also happily married and have girls that have never been bullied nor do they tolerate it in others - lifes good!
Linda
thank you so much Linda I really did write this post from the heart. I really dont think bullies understand the effect it can have on your whole life. I would like to know just what sort of person I would have been if i had not been bullied. At the end of the day i am a good person and have a lovely family
DeleteMany people don't seem to understand the devastation that bullying can cause to a young mind. So they don't bother talking to their kids about not bullying. I believe the solution to the problem is speaking out about it. Like you just did in your post. Awareness is the key. Thank you for sharing.
ReplyDeleteThat is so true. How many people have been bullied and cover it up.
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